Tetanus Shot for Tearing Ass?

I'm sitting in the waiting room of the local urgent care. Those in front of me in line are here for a bad cough or a sprained ankle - Me? I was inflicted yesterday with a serious case of tearing ass. How do I explain to the receptionist that I stumble through my days with the grace of a wobbly-legged new born fawn? That I snuck into a beach-side junk yard to go dumpster-diving for outdated, smelly textbooks? That I tripped over my own feet and sliced by butt (cheek, not hole) on the side of an old rusty trash bin?



The injury itself isn't all that bad: a two inch, even slice. The edges are smooth and it will probably heal up nicely. The location, however, is not so ideal. Imagine the difficulty you would have trying to thoroughly clean an injury that you cannot see and can barely reach. Thankfully, my boyfriend was a real sport about it and assisted me like a real professional, causing me minimal further humiliation. `



Now, however, I am overwhelmed with anxiety regarding the next step in my treatment plan. Tetanus Shot. Last time I attempted to give blood I fainted. Last time I was immunized I pushed the nurse. I can only hope that they use one of those child sized needles and reward me with a Snoopy band-aids (Small circular one for the vaccine, Extra-Large for the ass wound) and a sucker. At least I will have a funny story to tell my friends this week that will start with, "Jeez, I had to get a Tetanus shot for tearing ass...."

post script: I did see a biker fall down on my way back to work, so that cheered me up significantly. :-)